Monday, July 25, 2016

whatever...

 my blog has upset many folks because this is the  only place , I feel free to write about what I honestly feel..

I made the mistake (??) of letting a few folks know about my most intimate blog...

I have lived on this street almost as long as my wonderful friend, Charles, and the other family, who has only been a pain, even when my common law wife (gf of 13  years) lived...

I could go on about the past but I won't unless it is still pertinent, because bullies and control freaks  will always be that way...

x mother in law is control freak, and others ... now because some neighbors that I did not actually want them to know my blog was running are my most avid readers...

the only thing we learn from the past is we learn nothing... or if we don't learn from it, we are doomed to repeat it...

I made many mistakes, and this blog is my intimate diary which some nosy neighbors want to keep reading.. it is my life and here it is...
if you don't like it, as Martin Luther King said in German,


"Gehen eine andere Kirche finden, wenn Sie wie das nicht du wirst !"

Sunday, July 24, 2016

when folks bug me about things like my lawn being an inch too high, then in the next breath tell me to let it go about a confidence man builder, wbo overcharged me 50k for the shittiest work on my place that almost burned dwon,  then took over 83rd street, talked shit about me, stayed rent free without doing any more work on my place, yet asking for 3500 , so he could make payments on his huge boat that was in my garage and his Kawasaki...  ... then I couldn't get him out of my home unless I went to court, and his sidekick, my neighbor shows up when its of course none of his busness.. the judge interrupted him on his vindictive tirade about my behavior when it had nothing to do with a builder who didn't do the work that was contracted out to him..
The judge told him to sit down and it was none of the neighbors business..

 (im sure he will call him up to tell him about this blog , because the crook is still living in this town!! stealing from other customers with his big mouth of lies...

it frustrates me... somehow they have always known about my blog... perhaps through Dave who was also another famous shit talker friends with the pain in my ass, neighbor, who has continually talked shit , because it is in his nature to be a bully,
while folks like us are supposed to let it go..

yeh let things go , they say, but then they are the first to complain about how you set your garbage can in front of your home...

Saturday, July 23, 2016

my bad, my very good friend didn't tell her, but sneaky malicious neighbor told her about it and whined about my dog house...

apparently he avidly reads this site
 so he can tell his confidence man, builder, who stole 55k from me...
I have a judgment served for him owing 5,000...(the builder stayed in my home rent free with me paying him 3500$) while I was gone in Oz...
instead the builder maligned me all up and down the street gaining their confidence talking shit about me and even having barbecues inviting everyone to look at my home and brag that he would just take over my home...
it is amazing the thinking and rationalizing that go on in  their heads to justify their nosy behavior and actually as far as the builder is concerned, getting away a large crime and defrauding customers, the way Trump would...


the sneaky neighbor who talks shit to anyone whom will listen , including a long list of my tenants, (and wrecked my business with them so they would walk off without paying little or no rent for years, because I made the mistake of feeling sorry for the family)

im worried the statute of limitations is running out, so im sure he will quickly phone his confidence man to tell him to read this.. like he told my good friends wife...

I actually didn't want some folks to read this, but somehow, it slipped out years ago...


the names will be changed to protect the guilty when I write my book...
to be continued
 ... oh and by the way, the bloke that enjoys talking shit about others and that's why he probably loves trump (bullies love other bullies), he showed up in court to talk shit about my behavior, which had nothing to do with the shitty job that builder never did, besides never finishing correctly all the crap the builder forgot to do and lied about (including the Mexicans he hired left the large tools where left barely an inch of insulation...   so I look at my green lawn while the others are all brown from this long drought...  where has our freedom gone from the pursuit of happiness, with out some nosy neighbor always making sure to rain on your parade..      



  I am doing my best to just bring up my son, without others that have nothing better to than complain about your front lawn
                                                                                                                                                                  

Friday, July 22, 2016

always problems... for just wanting to enjoy your habitat

unfortunately, my best friend , divulged of my most intimate blog, that I don't even want my brother to read and of course, everyone else that knows my life and behavior, and will use it against with 5 page emails about my lawn and dog house..

they don't bother the other neighbors about any other crap,,, but one complains, and I suppose I will get a note on the door about the big dog house as a parting gift from my very helpful other neighbor...

I was given a huge essay about what I should do with my lawn and garden as far as upkeep...
it was kept track of because I had not completely finished it to the neighbors satisfaction before the last rain storm well over a fortnight ago... we are doing through a drought , but because I keep my lawn high, it has stayed greener than 90 percent of the lawns on the street...

it reminds me so much of the chair that I kept in front of my place on the beach... this angry eastern European girl believed it was her lawn, just as some folks tell you if let off one firecracker on july 4th, they come screaming out in front of my family that its their street ... and im chastised as an errant elementary student..

oh well,... riots and killings are going on all over our country, yet some folks get mad if your lawn is over an inch too high

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

Hi LA!  ... hope u are reading this..
I am embarrassed about my mental block with paperwork ... I do need therapy for me and my family..
the biggest obstacle is just getting started on all that paperwork, especially getting forms

Sunday, July 17, 2016

Garvald clinging onto adolescent middle age or this peter pan giligan syndrome??

so much he has to do, that he would rather write or even escape even more in his mind with this very rigged backgammon..   and then perhaps he has fantasies of the universe actually rigged by a being "God"   ..uh oh..pp pass... to heavy a subject...
but he continues with this hopeful agnostic "fantasy" that there is somebody pulling the strings.. and all he wants to do is be with his son, but he has to be the good cop...

so he has to get out of his overheating cave before 2 and soak up the coolness of the library while he plugs away mindlessly on his key board.. hoping for the inspiration that will get him over this huge hump in his life of indecision... which pulls him ever forwards to old age ...
he wants to treasure his moments with his son, but his son now disrespects him after hearing that his father is a "loser" in so many words.. "he doesn't even have a job, and then is just a leach""
his dad in law, would say with his sardonic redneck wit...

and they would say that's just Joe..."he's a goober"'  his stepsons live in would say... almost to say coming him its ok to be an asshole??

just as perhaps 40 percent of our population allows trump to be an asshole??
aah... to be continued..

those that slowly find out about my contentious blog are welcome to tell me which are my best essays when u peruse through all the years from the depressing time of the okie zone, when goober 2 was reelected and our country condoned our annoying aggravating wasteful (of human lives and bankrupting military bills)... aah don't get me started...

Friday, July 15, 2016

Please Lord, get my ass in gear so that I can focus on the future for our family!

Lord, or the universal energies that give you periodic signs , sometimes more and more frequently, ie. I said Baby,,, the tv says baby girl...
there's  a word I just say and the tv says it almost synchronistical...
I have so many things to do... and I wake up and I don't say wanna see all these bills , esp. gold coast rates!   1200 per month.. my tenant, Jesus, does not pay enough in rent to cover half of the bills, yet I am so poor...
aaa..... but I finally get to be with my son today, since my x bought her car and has a sales job coming up... she has been taking everywhere along with long walkabouts in the huge expanse of Okc and its white flight suburbs...
to be continued.. I really need to get a cheap wifi.. so that I know Im at least writing to you and my muse/benefactor, Leigh Anne...

hoping we will get some of this published , if whatever funds that she has helped me find like a

"TREASURE HUNT"

but the old man is too lazy to get off his ass and start filling out all the paperwork and getting the death certificates....

Meanwhile the world is in continual turmoil, while we reach the Malthusian end of the exponential growth of our killer species....
pp pass

Please Lord, get my ass in gear so that I can focus on the future for our family!

Lord, or the universal energies that give you periodic signs , sometimes more and more frequently, ie. I said Baby,,, the tv says baby girl...
there's  a word I just say and the tv says it almost synchronistical...
I have so many things to do... and I wake up and I don't say wanna see all these bills , esp. gold coast rates!   1200 per month.. my tenant, Jesus, does not pay enough in rent to cover half of the bills, yet I am so poor...
aaa..... but I finally get to be with my son today, since my x bought her car and has a sales job coming up... she has been taking everywhere along with long walkabouts in the huge expanse of Okc and its white flight suburbs...
to be continued.. I really need to get a cheap wifi.. so that I know Im at least writing to you and my muse/benefactor, Leigh Anne...

hoping we will get some of this published , if whatever funds that she has helped me find like a

"TREASURE HUNT"

but the old man is too lazy to get off his ass and start filling out all the paperwork and getting the death certificates....

Meanwhile the world is in continual turmoil, while we reach the Malthusian end of the exponential growth of our killer species....
pp pass

Thursday, July 14, 2016

I had a theme that I was going to briefly tell you about while I'm on a partial escape from myself and my cave while in this currently alienated state.... back to living with my x for 6 months...just telling u this freaks me out that some total stranger could find out this info and see all the things that ive... written...
I need to get a tape recorder... excited now that I have 2 other blogs,  turbayne.com and garvald.net since someone else has garvald.com    based in Edinburgh for special needs people (?)

overall its been another rough day where I have to learn to not lose it with my family back with me, with still the insecurity that they could leave at any time... I will eventually get wifi and have these writings coming late at night  or when Im romanticized by pictures of the sea or the colors of another evening passing my our view in our little backyard...

Saturday, July 09, 2016

What then is freedom? The power to live as one wishes.

well,, that one was a good one for me to not feel guilty about being lazy and doing all the shit that I have to do!!
its overwhelming, but at least my x who decided that I was Colin's best dad , has been living with me for 6 months....
our divorce was because bottom line, she is manic depressive as many of my xs were (I believe_)
I was agnostic about the condition , until living with the ups and downs of this condition(disability/or talen?)....
she finally got a job, and with a new Honda, but will have taken out of her paycheck.. perhaps they do this , because they are so happy to have someone be making payments for 6 years!!
and if she gets fired, she still has to make the payments...:(

Wednesday, July 06, 2016

ok.... dokie... back to the okie zone...

or should I say back to writing to my dear friend who I share some of my most intimate thoughts with sometimes total disregard for how it can be used against me...
I have so much to do and to follow up to get the right ids and stuff to get some of these funds...
I have to get the ball rolling to get something started..

I feel frustrated, overwhelmed and then lazy, before I finally get the ball rolling and Im taking that river out past these overwhelming waves which have been pounded against me and then I get enough chance for a breath before another giant wave comes over me and I have to hold my breath and wait before I can come to the surface to exhale!!!

I was almost surprised that my x, or other half of my unconditional love for the mother of our beautiful son.., came home with a job and a new Honda Saturn ... my son wants to celebrate, so we get in her new car and she feels as territorial as Buffy does with a toy she just acquired.... and we are off and
im just apprehensive about everything... her mom is paying the insurance because Im just living on fumes from all the help and old policies ive had since I was born... I love my parents because I will always have enough and last resort, I will have to sell my homes but not until our family has grown up in both hemispheres ...
as we vicariously live through our son experiencing everything new or the novelty of everything keeps us both fresh...


so they  are off today and my son is with her... frustrated that she didn't tell me... but Ive just been taking him to the library since I cant afford wifi .... but cox has this 10$ deal... so I can write fluently and just let the stream of consciousness (ala Ulysees) and write our famous book...
my benefactor, LA, has been my muse and it seems like the magic of writing happens so much more easily than this "evil" entity called facebook... (which we fear will store all of our personal info for some Russian hacker to take and possibly use against me if I run for political office (just kidding, I would get shot by a redneck gun carrying NRA disgruntled by my writing, or they burn my home down again because of the human trait of pure malicious hate (:... whoa... u know again my feelings of the ignorant redneck that voted in GW and could somehow steal the election again maybe with the help of putin(??)... and continue this endless war that I predicted while everyone was in this nationalistic hate and desire for war..)

ok.. my  writing can be a little overwhelming, but you my friend (I hope) can peruse through all my decade of writing...

Saturday, July 02, 2016

Hi good friends and the few that Ive selectively told about my inner personal domain... all this writing I eventually need to put together in a book!
I occasionally read my daily horoscope and its often close to my feelings...
I read the cookie that my x opened up for me" and said I would come into fortune!" , and just when my good friend , benefactor and muse told me the sites to go to...
my issue as always is getting the right birth and death certificates along with all the proper paper work (and that fact of work and putting my head together for it is worse than my fear of sharks...)
now its a quiet Saturday and there is peace at home, although my son and I don't like it when she overindulges in brew..
it sets her into another personality which so reminds me of the behavior in Oz that scared the beJesus out of me...

uly 2, 2016Basking in Self-Love
Sagittarius Daily Horoscope

You may feel loved and accepted today. You may find yourself seeking comfort and acknowledgment from loved ones and experience a sense of connection and belonging.
You can also choose to strengthen your sense of self-love by pursuing activities that make you happy. (library and playing this addictive losing rigged game of backgammon which only robs me of precious time and fast forwards me to another day gone and wasted... to accelerate my negative self talk>>.)

 Engaging in a self-love meditation to infuse yourself with feelings of happiness could also prove helpful.
 Simply set aside time to be alone, release all of your worries, and call up feelings of love from your heart’s center.

Visualize yourself as safe, happy, loved, and content, and allow these feelings to spread through your entire being. Spend as much time today as you wish basking in these feelings, and keep them with you as you proceed with the rest of your day.

and take in a deep breath of the cool ac air of the library with my son sitting across from me as he watches minecraft
 
 

Hi good friends and the few that Ive selectively told about my inner personal domain... all this writing I eventually need to put together in a book!
I occasionally read my daily horoscope and its often close to my feelings...
I read the cookie that my x opened up for me" and said I would come into fortune!" , and just when my good friend , benefactor and muse told me the sites to go to...
my issue as always is getting the right birth and death certificates along with all the proper paper work (and that fact of work and putting my head together for it is worse than my fear of sharks...)
now its a quiet Saturday and there is peace at home, although my son and I don't like it when she overindulges in brew..
it sets her into another personality which so reminds me of the behavior in Oz that scared the beJesus out of me...

uly 2, 2016Basking in Self-Love
Sagittarius Daily Horoscope

You may feel loved and accepted today. You may find yourself seeking comfort and acknowledgment from loved ones and experience a sense of connection and belonging.
You can also choose to strengthen your sense of self-love by pursuing activities that make you happy. (library and playing this addictive losing rigged game of backgammon which only robs me of precious time and fast forwards me to another day gone and wasted... to accelerate my negative self talk>>.)

 Engaging in a self-love meditation to infuse yourself with feelings of happiness could also prove helpful.
 Simply set aside time to be alone, release all of your worries, and call up feelings of love from your heart’s center.

Visualize yourself as safe, happy, loved, and content, and allow these feelings to spread through your entire being. Spend as much time today as you wish basking in these feelings, and keep them with you as you proceed with the rest of your day.

and take in a deep breath of the cool ac air of the library with my son sitting across from me as he watches minecraft