Tuesday, May 31, 2011

"the lunatic ravings of some seriously addled shortbus from down undah"

wow!! thanks!.. I guess my notoriety precedes me!



the older I get, the more amusing the human race is and how warped we might become in our aging minds!



I have so many challenges in life and i realize that humans are the biggest obstacle to one's pursuit of happiness...






and the older I get, I realize that the best revenge is to find happiness and success..



i've found that the biggest obstacles are egos that rarely admit that they are wrong... and how misunderstandings can rationalize the way people behave...

in my later adult life, I've read few books...



I've read "Driven to Distraction" and "48 Laws Of Power" before being seduced and entranced by someone that has kept me under a spell...



recently, I read a brief synopis of "48 laws of seduction" and then realized how many of these techniques were used...






and I actually regret not using some of those techniques instead of them being used on me in the ultimate con...







Now, I have more obtacles in my pursuit of a happy family.. but like the surf swim race, it's about learning to find the river and going with its flow so as to avoid life's very challenging waves....
and then once past these waves and we are heading home to possible victory,



it's taking your breath and waiting for the winning wave to take you to the 8th rank and victory!






Saturday, May 28, 2011

Reaching the 8th Rank!

wow.,..it's really great finally taking care of   business and finally standing up for me and my family..
desiring to become a good father and a more   caring patient husband..
it's easy to become tempted , but you just   don't let it happen...

are we lucky or just blessed?
 it's nice to know that you still have it  though..and you smile just a little flirtatiously, but you just don't go there...
it will be nice to have our place back    again and  we can celebrate out little home
as if she is still part of our family and has been held hostage for too long...
 and we can have her back at least for a little while for our little family before we find some good people who will take care   of her with love 
before we finally give her away instead of almost being taken or destroyed...

Today I had to go to  the downtown Okczone for the dreaded IRS!
I did the forms one step at a time, having the benefit of a tiny bit of adderall, when I know that I have to take care of business!
It was great meeting   with the IRS and they were helpful doing returns of the past...I felt like I was acing the test and now have a chance to get a large refund instead of thinking that I would owe them several thousand! @
suddenly being the head of the family, I am eligible for far more credits!
This has been worrying me for so long and I didnt even want to open it up
just as I was running away from responsibilities....
suddenly I am aware that I am a different person
realizing that I have to make wise  choices for my family!
More and more I see how    a good life is so much like a good chess match...
good friends help you out   of very difficult situations...
and we have out talents work   together in the pursuit of a common goal...
victory???
sometimes after the past couple days, I really feel that I am growing stronger  as I face challenging situations one step at a time!
I'm learning to be with good friends instead of ones that bully and coerce you into doing things that you don't want!

Friday, May 27, 2011

I could get upset about dealing with some people...
i try to accept it as part of human nature...
if people can take advantage of you, they generally will...
it is rare to find folks that you can trust

when you find someone that you can trust,
Rejoice!

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Hi, Im Brit Hume with Faux News. Greed is good!

so tornados came within a few miles of my home in the Okie Zone
and then I think ive got insurance this time
and think what is the point of investing all this $
when  a tornado could take it away
and they put the home up for demolition
unless its fixed...
this is how the Okies handle disasters I guess
where does the govt actually help
and all of our tax money
that I owe...
instead the powers that be
just want the tax money go to big oil companies
and to fight wars so that they can the last oil in the ground~!
and ignorant folks keep voting for the Neocon way...
which is bankrupt our govt and
then we will have to pay for everything just to park ourselves and live
if u dont pay taxes for oil companies, we will take your vehicles and homes away!
and these big companies will just be taking our serf wages in taxes
since they will own our govts when we have the new world order!!
pp pass...

"A plantation economy is an economy which is based on agricultural mass production, usually of a few staple products grown on large farms called plantations. Plantation economies rely on the export of cash crops as a source of income. Prominent plantation crops included cotton, rubber, sugar cane, tobacco, figs, rice, kapok, sisal and indigo. The longer a crop's harvest period, the more efficient plantations are. Scale economies are also achieved by long distances to markets and reduction in the crop's size. Plantation crops also differ in that they need processing immediately after harvesting. Sugar, tea sisal and palm oil are most suited to plantations, coconuts, rubber and cotton to a lesser extent.[1]


Regions with plantation economies have usually been in the southern United States, South America, the Caribbean, and Africa. Fordlândia is a 20th century example[2] of a plantation economy. Plantation economies are also historically associated with slavery, particularly in the Americas. Plantation economies usually benefit the large countries to which they are exporting, which usually manufacture the raw materials grown on the plantations into goods which are then traded back to the plantation economy. Throughout most of history, the countries receiving the crops have usually been in Western Europe.

"Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain.

Unless the Lord watches over the city, the guards stand watch in vain.

In vain you rise early and stay up late,

toiling for food to eat

for he grants sleep only to those he loves."

Tuesday, May 24, 2011


wow...first the tornado comes comes close to us in the ozarks, then i could have been driving through Joplin to check on my home in the Okie zone... now tornados have been reported there!!
what is going on with the weather??
but at least I put on my new car tags and they no longer say Oklahoma!
happy when Im taking care of business...
so many things to do...
and then u think , whats the point if a tornado sucks you up and takes you miles away!!
(I wrote this in the middle of the night after arriving on this hemisphere stayin at the Microtel)
I suppose the best listener is myself when I read all of this a few years later...

( i read the prophetic essay with Lillian the other night and im sure hoping she'll be my manager)
and I wish that I could go back in time and try to teach myself the patience

and nurture the seed that grows inside of me...

and now I have to slowly but surely have patience with my son and especially my relationship...
(and so as i help my son and treasure the little moments I have with him
when he hugs me and I love him back ..and how hes becoming my world)

that has been the most difficult challenging problem to overcome...
(and so i learn to fall in love again as i become happier the person that i sense i could become!)
I will learn how to play this game of life like a chess game...

already I'm way past the opening and all the pieces are piling up on the king and
 he looks for his pieces to come to his aid...
(and he realizes there are a select few that he feels safe to become his friends)
and then learn after staving off this attack on my king
gather the positive forces and energy to go on to victory...
and help his  pawns reach their 8th rank and become whatever they want...

the pawns could be metaphors for my talents or the people that I can pay it forward to...
and I really feel they will help me in my hours of need...

i hope

(it's amazing that I wrote this revised piece just a few weeks ago and sometimes how prophetic my writing can be...i was astounded about how I wrote a previous essay about my life and how accurate it was.. as im discovering pychic powers or maybe just another pyscho on the pscyo net :)
Hey G, why don't u write some more crazy shit?















my brother in law has been pushing me to watch this documentary about the falling republic by Alex Jones... I was soaking it all in until I looked him up at some of his protests and to me he sounded like a tea partier libertarian(?), but for me the jury is out and I do believe that we are heading to a world order!
but im glad that he's stoking the fire and getting blokes like my brother in law thinking about what the govt is doing...just questioning where are society is going is a good thing!

Monday, May 23, 2011

I suppose when this becomes a bestseller...... and we make l   little movies at least some on the utube...
i could easily get down but then I think who can have the lifestyle that we have...
ive got so many things to do...namely become Ozian !!

(I realized later that while I was writing this while the tornado was whistling through Joplin!)

Sunday, May 22, 2011

another rainy day on our parade... as I think about this anchor block in the Okie Zone...
what is the most effective way for our president to handle the wars that the Bush family started to control of the oil in the middle east??

Saturday, May 21, 2011



 so I have to decide on what kind of shed to build or not build...

frustrated that it's taken so long... and I  have to make sure that I have the input and not get pushed around!

I could get frustrated with human nature...
and then I see what I could have and sad about things... or could I go on and perhaps finally learn from the mistakes... especially in badly wanting to trust people...

'THE GREAT DUDE"


so, Dude, what are u looking for?
 The only place of refuge is the bathroom… that’s why its so nice to have your man/woman cave (to all the female readers..) so..im back in the Ozarks for all enquiring minds…
Deciding what to do about the situation… how much time have I invested in all this…more than half of my life in the worst(? so far)

While I have to decide this perhaps this weekend…
And I have to face the demons and go through with it…
Need to tell the squatter that ill be back there somtime and hopefully take  care of business…
Tie up as many loose ends….and have no worries that my home is well taken care of..

who's your little friend here, Mark?
While the rug rats in law keep knocking on the door of the lavatory…at least the door is locked before I watch a recording of the Great Lebowski...(ill tell u about meeting a double of Sam Elliot in this pub in an old building of a neighboring suburb and how I thought that I might be in a remake of the funny movie... i had to go back there to pick up my coffee cup given to Tohatchi teachers that I left there...and there was sam to greet me again!!)

Do I need another few more hours being slave to the autos on a
Road trip!! to see my stepsons basketball game in Little Rock...or do i hang out and watch the great movie with the stupendous Jeff Bridges??

wheres the little dude?
i have yet to read the letter from my builder...wondering how i could make it into an essay of my mood before and after I look at his perspective on my home...that ive invested more than half of  life in this anchor that has only caused hassles...so at least im laughing at this movie and think about the chorus(S. Elliot) talking about the DUDE'S adventures

did u get ur coffee mug, Dude?

Friday, May 20, 2011

Road Trip to taking care of business!!


 great friends, great people.... sometimes help you play it forward to better places!!

across yonder seas is the land called Oz!

Sunday, May 15, 2011


i was reading an old post from sept 2004.. and I realized how prophetic the post was...when u get the chance go back and look at the archives!After Alene passed away December 31st, 94 its been hard for Garvald to have relationships, often showing his needy side having been spoiled by her and sleeping with her most of those 13 x 365 days. That comes out to at least 4 of those years sleeping, making love and cuddling. Someone that knew him and cared about him was suddenly taken away without any warning. How could he survive other than putting his efforts into the children of his freshman biology class. Their bright faces took his mind off of her. He started writing to organize his own feelings and often would talk to her and his mother feeling that they were his match makers in heaven.
He was angry at the fundamentalist preacher at the funeral for telling him where she was in heaven and not an angel. Occasionally, he would feel her presence wanting him to be taken care of for this one time for his soul to be on this earth. He wanted to believe but did not want any organized religion written by man to tell him the way things were.

He often struggled at his various middle school science teaching positions until he felt more of a niche and skill with emotionally challenged students. There were little signs along the way. He still went through many relationships trying to find his perfect woman.

He tuned into pagan thought and spirituality that mirrored many of his own feelings brought out in his writing when he finds intelligence, beauty and compassion with a young pagan girl that appears to be his soul mate.Actually she mysteriously found him on the psycho net. She had written to him and surely someone as young as here wouldn't be interested in him.
She was a psychic or at least claimed to be.
She had told him that "Garvald" had come out on the Ouija board long before they met. She and her mother would often play with the board.
Her daughter, who called him "Daddy",
was born on the same day Alene was born and that mysteriously, was about the same time the brief relationship ended.She and her mentor witch also much older than her pushed him into get an engagement ring. This born again pagan girl believed in him more than he did in himself and reached a state of happiness that he never had almost thinking that he would become a father.

He bonded with her son who often told him how he was looking forward to him being his father. His own father never could give him the love and acceptance that he desperately wanted so much. Garvald would often become verklempt (all choked up) at the idea of becoming a family man and not being alone again. It was all too good to be true. He did not deserve someone like her. When her mother came down to visit with the step dad it was all over. Mother dearest was cold and judgemental. She looked at a painting of Alene and remarked how closely her precious daughter looked at her. She presumed that was why this older man was marrying her daughter. The pagan girl told him of her very controlling ways.
"Why are you marrying this old man? He does not know plumbing or anything about keeping up a house."
They all and had a breakfast together. While her daughter was in the bathroom, her mother had to make sure she told him how her daughter was emotionally unstable and had to put away for a while. He wondered how this woman he was so in love with could have such a cruel mother??
The mother and the passive step dad left and Garvald was momentarily happy...
That Sunday afternoon, he saw her black cats inside his infinity after he leaving the top up. A popular break up song was on the radio. It was a bad omen.

"Hurricane Michelle was the 13th named storm and one of the strongest hurricanes of the 2001 Atlantic hurricane season. One of only four November Category 4 hurricanes, Michelle made landfall on south-central Cuba with winds of 140 mph, the strongest Cuban landfall since Hurricane Fox in the 1952 season. The hurricane brought torrential rains across its path from Central America through the Greater Antilles, killing 17 people and causing widespread damage." after it dissipated and destroyed every remnant of her love, all that was left was her ring that represents "infinity" ... "You're not it" she brutally told him in her last email and kept the engagement ring.

Long after it was over Garvald would often become depressed thinking how happy he was with her. It was more of a loss than with Alene..He then realized how time was so fleeting, so he pursued his writing as a hobby and desire to express his soul as a healthy release for all his pain . He would have a similar feeling, when he went swimming, bicycling, and surfing. He wrote on many notebooks, lost notes and poetry in cyber space ...He wrote on pieces of paper his ideas and angst. He was formulating an idea to put all of this together
into a magical book of his world. He would eventually have it written as a website and then a book, then share it with his world and the rest of the universe.

All the signs seemed to be telling him to get out his comfort zone or Okie Zone ...He started stretching his paradigms. He goes to Chicago to see a soon to be published author. He loved her but he left Chicago not making the effort to get a teaching job there almost afraid of the cold depressing winter there. He helps her with the idea of writing about oneself in the third person especially when her book was dealing with the physical and sexual abuse from her parents in Texas. A month after they break up, her book was accepted and she thanked him in the acknowledgements for helping her overcome her fears by writing it all in the third person.

When he comes back from Chicago, he has an interview with Kansas City Schools. They want him to teach children with behavior disorders. He has a job to go back to in Oklahoma but he sits in his car in Westport and asks the universe what should keep him in KC? A bar mate at the Buzzard Beach, Mark, tells him to check out First Fridays at Nelson's Museum of Art. He meets Muffy who introduces him to the world of politics and feminism. They go to fight for female reproductive rights on a bus trip to Washington D.C. She challenges him about his ADD and always keeps him on his toes especially if she wasn't fed, needed a cigarette, cannabis, or it was a week before "Aunt Flo".

In February, he finally gets the prescription for Adderall (she called it "Adda boy!" for the difference it made in the way Garvald could focus and get things done) It's like he has suddenly put glasses on and can see how he does not need to be overwhelmed with life's daily struggles. He wonders how he would have done those IEPS (individual education plans) without it! He feels that being a white male teacher, his African American administrator does not like him from the first day of school and he's sorry that he didn't follow his intuitions about her and her obsession with power so much that she has her staff and janitors spy on the teachers. To get her and the emotionally disturbed director off his back he turns in his resignation for the end of the year.

Garvald makes it a point to still finish the year well, developing his rapport with the parents to help improve the behavior of his students. He worked far better with the parents and he did his best to keep the principal away from his classroom as she only would undermine his authority. (more about the craziness of this school in later installments)

Garvald relaxes and recuperates from the emotionally strained year during the summer. He thinks the strain made his back a lot worse! Muffy introduces him to Lillian who shows him how to start his website. He sees light at the end of the tunnel when he realizes this book would be his own self actualization. This website and book will help him heal and discover what his talents are. He knows that when he reaches his peak, the engine is running and he has taken off, he will find his once and future schwagmaiden. He can see little ones in his magical place. Occasionally he had visions of these "responsibilities" running around his fantasy home in between Nimbin and Byron bay. He could see the coast from his large bedroom/studio window on the first floor and the blue mountain view from his upstairs balcony! ("Lifestyles of the "Rich and Infamous"). Will his once and future Schwagmaiden join him in the journey or will he find her at the end of his journey finding his real home.?

He saw this place and others in Byron Bay and Nimbin, Australia. He also imagined this magical place when he went to Schwagatopia.

When he finds his magical place and maiden, the book will be written and he will find peace and happiness with his new family perhaps in the land of OZ??

Saturday, May 14, 2011

When will we learn to live harmoniously?

Ive got a stick to chew and knaw down the strength of NEOCONS!



phew...thought i couldnt chat with u...
its sure cool hanging with LA , Buffy and family....
it's nice to just crash with friends with folks that have read my blog
and I feel comfortable
ok,,,i shuldnt feel guilty about visiting old haunts!
its like Deja vu...
how bizarre it is for all the weird signs/coincidences, serendipities...
and the ideas that have come around..

Crow Mac has helped me with this epiphany in life...
and think how wonderful it would be celebrate our writers club..
holding onto my place for a little bit longer stuck in the Okie Zone
as folks come and go trying to take posession of her...
and then I see us in our little cottage by the patio in our garden
with hopefully high fences...
how can we set this all up??
how can we all be out there celebrating life??
Crow Mac, Charles,Buffy's family, and our little family
all running around in our little home away from home...
while we sit around enjoying the evening... and then waking up to shine into our little place
and maybe the market will be accelerating upwards as folks try to find their own little bit of land and shelter to escape to...


mmm... what can we grow in Garvald's Garden??
 
IT is great HANGIN OUT WITH OLD FRIENDS... IVE MISSED THEM SO MUCH!

i figured i ought to show a pic of me before i gained the 8lbs piggin out at the Chinese Buffet near Arrowhead Middle School.. one of those places where I hated the principal and she hated me..but I survived the lady...it seems like there are controlling women no matter where u go... and they just get fat from finding a place to squat...and they often end up in the heart of the Midwest...
is that why there arent any beaches here...it would be scary seeing these folks in the midwest on the beach!!
I think i need to buy a wt scale  so I dont all the 10 kilos ive lost... those buffets look so inviting!

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

if i can do at least one thing productive each day, and encourage my wife to do the same, we can go somewhere...slowly but surely we can make it!
Colin is still recovering from jet lag, going to sleep past midnight...
and his dad's hours are the same..
but the best thing is to take a road trip!

and get my bike before I get too fat!

Monday, May 09, 2011

Beautiful Byron Bay!
Boy, I wish I was in Byron Bay for the swim race! I already miss Oz!

Sunday, May 08, 2011

Toronto Globe and Mail February 26, 2005:

Hunter telephoned me on Feb. 19, the night before his death. He sounded scared. It wasn't always easy to understand what he said, particularly over the phone, he mumbled, yet when there was something he really wanted you to understand, you did. He'd been working on a story about the World Trade Center attacks and had stumbled across what he felt was hard evidence showing the towers had been brought down not by the airplanes that flew into them but by explosive charges set off in their foundations. Now he thought someone was out to stop him publishing it: "They're gonna make it look like suicide," he said. "I know how these bastards think . . ."

somebody did a search today for "
hunter thompson was working on wtc collapse story before mysterious sudden death, warned he'd be 'suicided'"
from Okc (the heart of the Okie Zone) and they were on my site for 79 seconds...
pulling up the article I cut an pasted after Thompson's mysterious questionable death...
my brother in law brought more attention to the "implosion " of the towers...how they fell and the only way they could have fallen according to engineers would be that way.. the towers were supposed to withstand plane crashes....My brother, Ron, was working in the neighboring building (American Express) when they heard the crash..  and then he saw the second plane crash into the building after they all evacuated his very tall building. He decided to get the hell out of there and took a ferry to New Jersey. He was actually talking to an engineer who ironically told him the same thing. When he arrived across the river, he saw the towers fall!

Saturday, May 07, 2011

its been 2 weeks and we still have jet lag!...
im already missing Oz...
it sometimes seems that the more you give people something, the less they apreciate it...
...I wonder how we can get out of the Arky zone...
or at least the inlaw zone...
before I get bugged for paying more for groceries...
the more that you give, the more they want...
and Im miserably bored and getting out of shape...
when I could be swimming in the ocean!
watched a good movie called "Fair Game" with Naomi Watts and Sean Penn during


our very corrupt Bush administration. It was just the way I thought when we

suddenly invaded Iraq based on a lie (WMDS) in 2003! it is scary if these

republicans get into office again! our country could be in perpetual war (for

oil)

Tuesday, May 03, 2011

I thought that this would be a good day... and it was ... well, at least above average if not to be turned around by the inlaws...
and then learning to cope and make peace with the ice queen...
and then let myself be understood.
i guess none of my better half's family understand what we are trying to get through
jet lag......
today I make the meal with rice with baked beans, celery, and it was a big hit..
at least with the compliments...
but then understanding why a to whom it may concern: letter...
about making a meal...
so I do that...
but i guess the artic temperature vibes ... that start off  with reading the letter..
i suppose instigated with the noise that we were making...
going down hill sunday morning when I have to sleep on the fold out Poppa in law's den...
and wake up to them both staring at me when i sleep in till 930...
ok.,,  i guess that its tough for anyone to have guests...
but the sooner the better we find our own place
and before u know it...
we'll be outta here...

forgive my brainstorming, but Im filled with thoughts, and it all needs editing...

May 3, 2011, 9:52 AM

… as if my parents (guardian angels were speaking to me)..
Fantastic ideas came to me … but yesterday I found some herb hidden away in my car for a rainy day... and maybe that was the catalyst for all of this...and the sun was beaming into my inlaws house

giving us all a respite from this deluge of rain that has been following us to both hemispheres of the globe... there was flooding in Oz and now there's flooding in the Ozarks...
 and then when I was talking to angela after playing with Colin....she said that I have lots of great ideas but what comes to fruition?.. I told her that I've  always had this dream/vision of living on the beach
and bringing up a family (if I were to have one of my own) in our little Shangri La (could be Mermaid Beach)...and so now I shouldnt feel guilty about just devoting the next couple of years to being good parents for our son until the $ runs out..

I realize that folks with ADD can often be dreamers... they have visions but most often these trees of ideas don't ever bear fruit, because people don't take the little baby steps to get there!

I had the epiphanies when I was talking to her..and I need her and our son to help…
Maybe
Kind of goes in line with the note from Mum in Law written "To whom it may concern"
about going to the store to make ingredients for a dinner tonight when she gets home from tutoring…
To go get things for dinner…pasta, celery, veggies, flax, rice..

And then I need to take the camera and we can get things together..angela has cash..
I had a dream that was so filled with activities.. I was walking up these winding stairs but maybe it was like walking up the 4 floors of Monroe High School.. but it was like a museum (or just a large building with lots of activities and clutter)...I would be distracted by the mirror and would thing of ways to cut my hair, because believe it or not, I often have a full head of hair in my dreams...
I was traumatized in my late adolescence when I started losing my hair...and see it left on the pillow...
but after waking up from this dream, I was suddenly invigorated with all the things we had to do

especially for our son, our future... and our children are our future!

Monday, May 02, 2011

like Bay of Pigs!

what president would play the best game of chess??...
and finally to have the strength and ability to make the right decision in the heat of the moment...
when u have the moment to checkmate your opponent and not lose on the chance to have victory


watching the Kennedy's , seeing JFK making decisions in the same way that Obama has called on his ghosts of past prezs to help him...

Sunday, May 01, 2011

Ding Dong! Bin Laden is dead! Now let's get out of the middle east!

I just heard it could have been an unmanned plane! I found out it was a group of commandos and there were no American deaths! only lost a helicopter...its nice to finally feel something good about our country... Fox  news (the right wing corporate controlled news station) misspelled his name Usama Bin Laden...
 Now lets give peace a chance!

 or is this bloke really dead??  when will we see the real picture??


hundreds of thousands of lives lost to fight terrorism because of this man?? was it necessary to invade Iraq and Afghanistan and put our country into bankruptcy over it??



Well I decided to try a new theme for this blog… Sometimes I’m amazed at all the posts that I’ve written over the years and comes up 2000s...