Reaching the 8th Rank!

wow.,..it's really great finally taking care of   business and finally standing up for me and my family..
desiring to become a good father and a more   caring patient husband..
it's easy to become tempted , but you just   don't let it happen...

are we lucky or just blessed?
 it's nice to know that you still have it  though..and you smile just a little flirtatiously, but you just don't go there...
it will be nice to have our place back    again and  we can celebrate out little home
as if she is still part of our family and has been held hostage for too long...
 and we can have her back at least for a little while for our little family before we find some good people who will take care   of her with love 
before we finally give her away instead of almost being taken or destroyed...

Today I had to go to  the downtown Okczone for the dreaded IRS!
I did the forms one step at a time, having the benefit of a tiny bit of adderall, when I know that I have to take care of business!
It was great meeting   with the IRS and they were helpful doing returns of the past...I felt like I was acing the test and now have a chance to get a large refund instead of thinking that I would owe them several thousand! @
suddenly being the head of the family, I am eligible for far more credits!
This has been worrying me for so long and I didnt even want to open it up
just as I was running away from responsibilities....
suddenly I am aware that I am a different person
realizing that I have to make wise  choices for my family!
More and more I see how    a good life is so much like a good chess match...
good friends help you out   of very difficult situations...
and we have out talents work   together in the pursuit of a common goal...
victory???
sometimes after the past couple days, I really feel that I am growing stronger  as I face challenging situations one step at a time!
I'm learning to be with good friends instead of ones that bully and coerce you into doing things that you don't want!

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Image
i went downstairs to admire the almost full waning moon...
realizing my own mortality...
i think of a friend who had his wake up call at a much younger age
and then i get a glimmer of what my own mortality could be
when i walk across Hedges ave.
and suddenly see double with much better acuity...
it was bizarre
i closed either eye and didnt see double
but then I could walk just shutting one eye
to a chair
to see my beloved ocean one more time
and eat a halloween mini candy bar
the uneasy feeling wondering when the double image
fades away with each bite

hypoglycemia or
a mini stroke....

and I hug my son that evening
and play frisbee with my son more than i ever have
having discovered my son's new toy hidden among
the seaweed about a 100 meters out from shore...

the feelings run across my mind that night,
with frustration at my own body's fragile shell
and the necessary need to establish the bucket list....



and this Mermaid tale needs to be written!

so we pass it on from one gener…
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