The Spell is Broken!
We had such a great time that we went to
Day Trips the next day!
Lo and behold about bizarre coincidences I met the ex husband of an exgf. The last time we chatted coincidentally was when the lady and I were in a relationship. She went ballistic when she found out her and I were having an impromptu conversation about being a controlling woman.
The realization of who she really was had been missing from the closure that I needed. It is so heart warming when this image of a woman is totally shattered w... you find out that she truly is a psycho instead of the angel you thought she was! It was a virtual epiphany and a weight was lifted. You find out how you were marvellously manipulated by a disturbed woman just the way she had done to the other men in her lives. It was also great to find out that she had become obese. It would have been the icing on the cake to see a recent photo.
A recent quote to show the manifested derangement,
"First, the kind of bird I am right now is a bluejay. protective of my family, and loud about it. Someday, i want to come back as an owl. I love their silent, night time rituals. but first, I would probably come back as a pigeon and follow my least favorite person around and immediately poop on his head every time he walked outside, and then do the car handles while he was inside...."
hmmm, and I fell in love with this mentally unstable person??
I have so many IEPS next week. They schedule so many of them in a week it could easily be overwhelming but it's nice to have the addaboy handy...I have so much more confidence know just knowing that I can accomplish so many more menial tasks especially tedious paperwork, phonecalls and essential trips. I have that pretrial meeting looming over my head, but at least I have a much better outlook about it confident that I will beat it and at least procrastinating the worry!!
I think overall, the holidays were better than average at least in coming to terms with so much sadness and mortality that has befallen me in the past 12 years... I'm coming to term with NewYear's eve when Alene, my soulmate, passed away. I attempt to not get bogged down with the menial activities and worries over trivial things. I attempt to enjoy the little things in life that give me pleasure:
1. cuddling Buffy and seeing her anxiously waiting for me to come home
2. Watching her get so excited to see me ...
3. Watching her patiently wait for me to go to bed so she can get on the comfy bed with me
4. I hug her and she gives a contented sigh before immediately falling asleeep!
5. The joy when a student learns a concept and the satisfaction that is shown on his face.
6. The joy of making a creation that will make an impact on others.
7. The taste of my home made cappucino while the sun comes up over the desert in the morning
8. Walking in the fresh high desert air just as the sun begins to warm up the mountains on my left side!
I have another hour on the library's puter. I cannot even talk to you everyday like I used to . I have to drive into town when I get my groceries and a TV remote since I lost one...vaguely I remember absentmindedly (an ADD moment) taking it with me and I would put it in a "safe place"...of course I always forget the safe place...and then when my mind is on something else, I might even leave at my gf's house!
I forgot what I was going to write to you about??...Oh yeah, the laptop! I finally broke down and invested in one from Best Buy! The problem is that I don't have wireless and I thought somehow in my warped thinking would get free wireless somewhere??
G, there is no free lunch! Duh!!
but at least you have finally the tool to use in your writing...you can take the puter to a wireless cafe somewhere in the world and write??......ok, I'm rambling...Charles notices that also when I might imbibe in a little herb.
I often have things to say but I feel like I need to know that whatever I am writing is immediately out there...Gosh...I only have 11 minutes left. I can easily afford to buy into wireless! I just hate the way cable companies have a monopoly on this!
Buffy, his canine soul mate!
Canine soul mate, G finds his soul mate biking up and down the slopes of the courtyard sidewalk as Buffy speeds by in her love of running and frolic..By understanding this beautiful animal, he can understand the deep rooted love that humans feel for each other..They have a need plus a connection ..Sometimes the way a dog would connect with her master but in humans we are equals but there is a tendency for one to be dominant in some aspects of their lives ...what he wears, the looks of their domicile, their desire to be in control so they go through husbands and bfs like throw away watches or fads(?)
He has momentary euphoria mixed with some brew to keep his blood sugar above normal
wow!...ONE STEP TOWARDS LOSING MY INTIMIDATION TOWARDS PUTERS!
Getting internet access with my own laptop is so wonderful! I finally decided to get out of the 3 day weekend hibernation and visit a cafe! I can write to you whenever I come into town. The next step will be to get the word perfect connected!
FRIDAY IN THE BIG CITY OF THE LAND OF ENCHANTMENT!
WOW! It is sure nice to go to to a hotel and get free internet from a choice of neighboring hotels with internet access!..Nice to have a hotel room in the middle of civilization instead of so much isolation and loneliness in Utopach!...Muffy just called and she was really down about
the apartment complex having to make cutbacks just when she was expecting a raise! I hope that I can cheer her up..I wish that I could be with her to cheer her up..
Buffy is always happy to check out a new location now sleeping on the floor...I have total uncensored access to the world while watching cable!
I only wish that I had some herb to accentuate the evening. I was worried that someone was hurt but the way I look at her situation is that she will only get a much better job now managing and selling apartments!
Samstag at motel 76
Snow arrived last night, while I snuggled in my little nest ...my little family of Buffy and moi! ;)... I have two more hours to write to you...it would be nice to score a little herb with the benefit of anonymity in this big city surrounded by mountains in the middle of the desert ...I have to put the puter beside the window diagonally across from the Daze INN (they have free Internet but the signal is probably less than 50 yards..I'll need to find out if anyone with the internet access in Utopachi is willing to share some of the costs so I can chat with you anytime I want...the school district has banned access to blogging now so it's essential I have another source to the world out there..It's snowing now while you listen to my stream of consciousness. The lady at the gas station said that the state and I-40 will probably be snowed in for the whole weekend and more! They will shut down any roads out of here like they did before...that sounds kinda exciting!...Well, the snow has almost stopped but nothing is sticking...most of it is melting thanks to global warming ;)