Squaw Valley snuggled into the beautiful Serendipach Range
I walk with Buffy and let go of her leash in our backyard, the Serendipachi range, with no vehicles to worry at the base of this range. It is so green now . You forget that you are in a high desert . It has rained more this summer than it has in 15 years!
Today was Marty's first day. I realized actually how happy I was to see him almost as if he was my son. I was proud of him and saw his growth over the summer. He's working at Denny's washing dishes earning lots of spending money. You wouldn't believe him to be the same immature boy that walked into the trailer that I had as a classroom this time last year. I gave him a book of Australia and he seemed happy to see me too! I felt much more of a rush than I did with Clay (almost like these boys were my children!) It is amazing when you are gone from someone close (especially Buffy) for a couple of months, the deep warmth that you get when you see them again.
I was so happy to see my favorite chess player again. He was taller and more mature also. He came by for a quick game of chess before he had to go to football practice even though we didn't have time to finish. How wonderful it is to feel the growth and success within him and others that you have worked with! Both he and Marty made such great strides second semester. When you instill in these children some passion and reason for being you realize that it was all worthwhile too. When they have a little success in chess or even just getting a job they blossom!....like flowers in the desert blooming so magnificently with all the different colors after the summer monsoons.
(gosh, I'm becoming verklempt in my middle age with tears welling up in my eyes now! ...sometimes, I love to let myself fantasize(?) that Dad is with me still... he wrote to M just before he floated over to the other side, that even though we hadn't talked much over the long distance line to OZ he was with me spiritually...uh oh, tears are really rolling down my cheeks now! I guess it's really raining from heaven now!)
Marty started thinking about his work and careers. When I had him write in class about his feeling he showed his motivation to succeed and graduate. He had a very rough first semester with his very close second cousin .( a freshman commited suicide by hanging himself and the whole school was in mourning for a long time with attempts by him before Xmas and others)
I am so excited about the year. He still did not have a great day but that is normal for him. He told me that he walked out of the Spanish class and then cussed at the principal. He was sitting in the life skills class with Betty Lou. I took him back into my room and enjoyed chatting with him while I taught a retarded girl cursive.
(She is a mother of a child and married to a man much older than him . She wants to learn and be a good mother. I saw a great amount of growth in her over the summer too. She and her husband would come by my home to sell things occasionally.)
Today he told the very good new young peace corp teacher with a pony tail whom the Borg thought would work better with these kids, to fuck off a few times ...I chatted with the young gentleman with the humbling experience in Bangladesh that was just his way of bonding with him!
"You should have seen the was with me the beginning of last year."
Tom laughed! He's a very nice chap! He's the new young hit with all the 4 Navaho assistants in the life skills classroom (sans the severely disabled kids) and especially Betty Lou (she appears to have a tendency to become fond of younger men including the other sped teacher, Julio the Latin flirt from Equador).
I'm happy that they aren't here so I can take them back to my classroom and not deal with the current negative vibes from the gossiping squaws with nothing to do but chatter away! Without these ladies to distract the kids I am able to bond with my new students and they want to learn!
I had a poor attitude yesterday still angry at Betty Lou staking her parking place in the life skills class like she does in every classroom of the past, present and future. She has more furniture than any teacher. She has taken over (by eminent domain) several pieces of school property to establish her territory even more than my bitch does in our front and backyards. We started off last year in the trailer and she made sure to occupy a great portion of each room. She has her desk, her computer desk, her school phone (of which she's on the phone or surfing the computer evertyime I walk by..She has been able to succesfully do it in what ever classroom she lays down her stakes.) She even wants for her big newbubba truck to lay claim to the only parking spot with a shady tree . This week I've had to ride my car instead of walking since I've had to run errands. I was happy to be earlier than her this morning and gleefully take posession of the shade ;) Now she is documenting every conversation we have since Tom is tired of being our intermediary. Of course the documentation came up on my classroom printer. I picked it up wondering where it came from and saw more spin on our brief chat than Faux (Fox) news channel's O'reilly and Ohannity! I have been "snappy" with her and moved her filing cabinet "scraping" the hallway floor into the life skills class. My snappiness was witnessed by the other hens and she claims a student (uh no). There are 3 larger more comfortable desk chairs and desk apparently posessed by the assistants. Marge said I could put my things an old table when I come to the classroom (I'm scheduled there for 3 hours !) So I sat on Tom's chair (who teaches there has one of those cushy rolling chairs)
"Why are you sitting on Tom's chair?"
I actually in retrospect think this whole sped hallway could make a great sitcom.
A bellagonna (white man) learning how best to deal with the ladies of this tribe.
The male janitors (males are obviously 2nd class in this matriarchal society) think the whole situation is hilarious. They all make sure to kid me about how me and Betty Lou act like we are married!
I requested that she not work with me but the Borg still let her go and make her home in my life skills class which I have for more than 3 hours a day. I'm wondering when she'll bring in her own couch and matress?? There she was effectively gossiping to the other 3 assistants in that class in her native tongue while making little snide remarks to me as if I did not belong there.
Fortunately none of the severely disabled students were there so I could take the other students into my classroom (I actually feel much more at home there with out the Navaho gossip. I've bonded with Julio sharing my freshly ground coffee. He's promised me some tasy Venezuelan coffee. I don't feel any negative vibes in the room anymore since my "wife" has finally vacated her settlement . I don't have her to constantly nag me anymore! I feel free again!
I woke up to a beautiful day today and just knew that I was going to have a great day even saying hello to BL with her usual ignoring from her. The bad vibes from her have sluffed off onto the substitute assistant who is one of the grandmas in the community. She is in the same clan as my favorite chess player. He called her grandma as children do to the older ladies in their extended familiies. It is obviously a matriarchal community as they are the prime force in bringing up the children. The men are often out of the picture as they are inner city communities but not at all in the same way. This community is extremely family orientated.
Today was the best day because I was well rested and had a much more positive attitude. I wasn't going to let any sour lady spoil my day.
I came home and hugged my gorgeous little bitch as she jumped up and down so happy to greet her master. I had the feeling that I wasn't going to be lonely this year and was going to find enjoyment in everything especially the evening show each night while Buffy frolics by the very green ditch that takes all the torrential rain out of the pasture.
I'm getting up early and learning more now how to seize each day and make the moment last....from playing with Buffy to kidding with my students as they enjoy learning math and English! The assistant (married to a teacher and expecting in October) was often laughing at my jokes. It was great. I actually sometimes think I'm becoming a good teacher. With the addaboy I'm even getting better organized!
"Surely it is much more generous to forgive and remember, than to forgive and forget."